More Health Problems

Yesterday I finally got a call from my primary care doctor telling me that the results of my blood test are that I have high blood sugar, my cholesterol is 350 when it should be below 150. The results of the CT Scan were that I have a large Cyst on my ovary and I have "Inflammation of the lining of my colon".

I looked up on the net about the colon thing and it looks like it is a type of ulcer. The doctor told me that I needed to see a surgeon about that. I am very nervous about this and I don't know what to do. I am going to see a doctor about the colon today. It was suppose to be an appointment to have a colonoscopy but I don't know if I still need to have that done since I had the CT Scan.

I also have to go on a diet. Not the kind of diet where you lose weight but the kind of diet where you lower your cholesterol. My doctor is suppose to send me a menu of sorts that explains what I should be eating. I am going to have lobster with butter for the last time tonight. I really love lobster but I can't eat it until I get my diet and cholesterol back in order. That could be a while.

I am really going to miss a lot of my favorite foods. I have to say that most of the food that I eat is starches or fried food. I love mashed potatoes, pasta, bacon, and all that good stuff. Now, I have to eat lots of fruits and veggies. I also have to cut back on the butter. I love butter. But I need to do this for my health.

The good news here is that I was already on a path to better my health. I was already trying to quit smoking. The only problem is that I am trying to quit smoking. This is going to be very hard to try and quit smoking while trying to better my health in all of these other ways and knowing that I have all of these other health problems now.

I have had so many health problems, I don't know why these few things are making it so much harder to deal with. It's just so hard. I already have a fear of death and the more illnesses that I get the closer to death I feel I am. It's a terrible feeling. I am really hoping that after I see the doctor today I will be able to feel a little bit better about the whole thing.

My best friend is very concerned and that makes me feel good. My husband however doesn't seem to be concerned at all and that makes me feel bad. I don't know why my husband is so unemotional especially when I need him to be. He just says things like "We don't know what any of this means so there is no reason to worry". That's the whole reason to worry, I don't know what it means. I really like having a friend that is so thoughtful. We have our problems sometimes but I know that I love her to death and I will always forgive her no matter what happens.

So, needless to say I am very worried today. I don't know what is going to happen over the next few weeks and what all of this means anyway. I really need to get in and see my doctors as soon as possible. After I see all of the doctors I will know more and maybe then I will feel more settled. At the same time I may find out that there is more to worry about then I think right now.

Well, I am going to go and get ready for my appointment today. My husband is actually going to take off of work early to take me to this appointment. I am really happy that he is going to be there with me. I would have hated to go to this alone. Plus, I have a really hard time remembering what they tell me at appointments. he is pretty good at asking questions and things like that, plus it mean I won't be alone if they give me bad news. I also have to schedule a surgery and I will need him to be there to know what time is good for him to take me. I am glad I am not going alone.

After the appointment I am going to be going shopping and I will try to post more about this after I get home. It is very therapeutic to post about what is going on in my life. It doesn't exactly make me feel better but it makes me be rational about what is going on. If you are having a lot of stressful stuff in your life I suggest creating a secret website and posting all the things that are going on in your life. The reason to do it secretly is because it will give you total freedom to say everything that is going on in your life. You don't have to worry about what you say because no one you know will read it. It allows me to talk about my friends and family without worry. I can be honest and release some of my stress. Try it, I promise you will feel better after just a few days.